Our story starts in the 13th century, with a man named Simon Stock. He will eventually become a saint (though he may never have existed, which is a trick some saints do; and then again, he may have absolutely existed, since parts of him are scattered throughout Europe, with some bones in Bordeaux, a tibia in Kensington, and part of his skull that he no longer needed, resting in Aylesford), but he isn’t when we meet him, on 16 July 1251, experiencing a vision of the Holy Mother, a brown scapular in her hand, and a promise that anyone wearing it would be delivered from Purgatory (if to Purgatory they were sent) on the immediately subsequent Saturday, which was the Holy Mother’s day to run errands, selecting the not-yet-holy who sported the divine object.
Wilson isn’t…gay? Enough? I mean, all Englishmen are gay, and everyone in England is an actor who has appeared in EastEnders or played Miss Marple (or both), so these gay Englishmen who perform heteronormativity are just really good at disappearing into the role. Except Wilson.
In one version of the story these Saints Crispin preached the gospel to the Gauls, made shoes at night, gave money to the poor, and were martyred — almost drowned, then beheaded. But there are no tigers in Africa and there was no Christian persecution in Gaul; however, both are very beautiful in the way… Continue reading Saints Crispin, v.2
When Christ our Savior was eight days old, as is traditional with Jewish boys, he was circumcised, like we all were in the ‘70s, except sometimes I’m not sure, looking at myself, but rarely, nudity is shameful and I’m busy enough already, but when I do look, I seem to be somewhere in between the… Continue reading Christ’s Holy Foreskin, v.2
This is best read by those who have already seen the documentary, but it’s your one wild and precious life, so gey gezunt. It’s just, so much of the power of this movie comes from not knowing what you’re about to see at all — going in with your own expectations, anticipating what a true… Continue reading “From what I heard, and kind of put together…”: Casting JonBenet